The BiPolar Reality Dispatch
Posted: Sep-24-2014 11:58 AM in People

Posts: 17
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The BiPolar Reality Dispatch Bako Blog 09.24.2014

Wednesday, 24 September 2014, Ceres, California…

This is a new blog on a community website that I’ve recently joined in an effort to establish both contacts and relationship here in The San Joaquin Valley. Recently relocated from Chicago with my wife and our two teenage kids, I am (newly) published author of “My BiPolar Reality; How Life Goes On…” and since this is all about sharing my work, I thought I would include the “Introduction” as it appears in the book as a way to begin this blog. In subsequent posts, which I’ll try to update weekly, on Wednesday, I plan to move to more “real time” thoughts, actions, feelings, notions, or whatever as this blog publications develops. I am into the idea of continuing the story of “My BiPolar Reality…” as my life goes on so organically sharing myself via this platform/forum, seems to be the right idea. It could be helpful in promoting my book, but more importantly, it potentially opens a dialogue with my readers to share our collective or individual experiences as people who manage a “cursed blessing” like BiPolar disorder. Then again, it might not do anything, nobody might ever read this or worse, it could become a magnet for negative energy! That’s alright too because what’s important is, for now, I’m having fun doing this!

So, without Annette nor further d’Lay…I give you the first few pages of my book “My BiPolar Reality; How Life Goes On…”


An Introduction


My name is d'Philip Chalmers and I was born on Thursday, the 7th of December of 1961 in Chicago, Illinois. I have fathered four children by three different women; I am presently married to my wife of 19 years and we live in the same suburb I grew up in with our two school age children. I’ve always been an artist, a writer mostly but I have dabbled in music, video, performance and photography. On the contrary, most of my employment experiences have been as a professional driver, a marketing manager, in retail sales or with a multitude of menial labor opportunities for cash under the table. I was, as a child, considered to have great potential to excel academically because of my high IQ (176), however, I was more autodidact and was never very interested in the educational process in school. As an adult, I earned both an occupational degree in sound engineering and production (1981) and then a bachelor's degree in media communications and marketing (1991), but to date I haven't made very much of these accomplishments. I have tried to start and operate four different businesses in the past 30 years. I enjoy the organizational development process, but fail to manage the daily routines of running a small company. These days, I prefer to work by myself at home, simply writing. I am on disability as the result of a major psychotic break in November of 2006; and that, in essence, is what this book is all about...How I've Learned to Successfully Manage My BiPolar Disorder so that my Life Goes On!

There are dozens of clinical and educational books about what BiPolar Disorder is, including books from a personal stand point by a wide range of people and their BiPolar experiences, not to mention, hundreds of resources available online for gathering information about all aspects of this very serious mental disorder. Why is this book any different, what makes this story worth telling and how could I shed any more light on an already exposed issue? This is why; with this book I have crafted an engaging, unique style of telling my story which will create something of a “BiPolar experience” for the readers of this book. This book not only teaches you facts about BiPolar Disorder, but it will give you a taste of this madness as well. In reading this book, a graphic, vulnerable, sometimes brutal journey of one person’s personal struggle then perhaps, one might have a better understanding of this mental illness. My hope is that after you read this story, if nothing else, you will have a bit more empathy for those afflicted with this disease (and others). I have not only been living with this disorder since I was 14 years old when it was still being called “manic depression”, I have been very diligent for the past 20 years in developing a form of therapy for myself which includes a variety of traditional and nontraditional methods for managing this disorder. I have personally used my own mind and body as a vessel for experimentation with numerous substances, drugs, medications and preparations. I have undergone many forms of therapy throughout the whole of my life: extending from family systems talk therapy, which focused on the dynamics of my family situation, to new age men's groups which included sweat lodges, dancing naked around bonfires with other men, and expressing every emotion imaginable in an effort to exorcise the demons I felt inside of me. There are literally dozens and dozens of notebooks, computer files, and scraps of paper with my meandering journal entries in them dating back as far as the 1970's with all of it, every last page of it, somehow stemming from this affliction of mine, this Rapid Cycling BiPolar 1 disorder.

BiPolar disorder is a very serious mental illness of which there is no known “cure” for and all we can do, as patients and a community, is learn how to best manage disease and develop the best possible coping skills we can. I am not a doctor nor a clinical researcher so although I will use some clinical and medical terms to describe this disorder, I use it in context of reference only, and make no claims to having any formal training on this subject matter. No formal training unless you count the past 37 years (plus) of having this mental illness and learning, the very hard way, how to successfully manage it to enjoy a very productive, positive and happy lifestyle. I am inspired to write this book because, through the various blogs and online community forums I have participated in, I realized that my words and actions, the things I was doing for myself and then sharing with others, was, in fact, starting to work for them as well! Indeed, when these random folks from the Internet tried doing the things I was doing, it was somehow working for them too. I make no claim that this is any kind of a cure for this horrid disorder, I suspect it's a different matter for different people because it always is, however, if I can help somebody, anybody and/or their loved ones who are suffering with this disorder, I'll have successfully reached an important goal. I have a lot of hope for those of us who are dealing with this “blessed curse”; we are a very unique breed, often with a lot of positive potential and passion for Life.

Although this book should give you a clear and concise insight into how this disease manifested in the life of one person (me), it is most certainly not a guide for diagnosis. If you suspect this disorder, my best and most sincere advice is to get yourself a professional psychiatric evaluation by a doctor or clinic that specializes in mental illness. This is not an easy step to take, quite frankly, it's like going to find out if you have cancer or something, it is that scary! Think about this, if you were having trouble with your heart or your digestive system, you would not hesitate to seek professional medical help, would you? So why is it, when it comes to having your brain checked out, possibly one of the most important organs in your body, people cringe at the thought? It's perhaps more terrifying than seeing a dentist, yet it's far more important to simply have your brain checked out, perhaps even tuned up a little, after all, without the full function and potentials of your brain/mind, your life and health could be far worse! Trust me, BiPolar disorder can wreak havoc throughout your world, it will negatively impact the world of nearly everybody you come into contact with, it's that destructive. It can kill you, in fact, you get so down you get suicidal. If it doesn’t kill you, it can easily turn inside out, creating homicidal actions causing you to do harm to others, without any control of yourself! Being BiPolar is nothing to shrug off, don't laugh about it (well, maybe a little) but don’t just keep ignoring the fact. If you even slightly think you or someone you know is ill, please get professional help as soon as possible! I know, with all my heart and soul, that if I did not get the treatment I did when I did, I would be dead today. So get help if you need it, please!

Lastly, in my most humble of moments, this book is deeply inspired by my sweet, departed daughter, Valerie Anne...for it was in her tragic loss, that I finally found my own salvation.

Thanks for reading and Enjoy!

Have Peace, Share Love, Find Bliss!

Be Well,
01 June 2014
Palatine, Illinois, USA, Earth

“My BiPolar Reality; How Life Goes On…” used by permission, The Intrepid Editor Press Ltd., © 2014


Okay, that’s it…the first post in “The BiPolar Reality Dispatch”, a weekly blog here on which I hope you enjoyed enough to subscribe to this blog, share it with others and when the book comes out next month (10.20.2014), maybe you’ll get a copy of the book yourself! I welcome any and all comments, however, I do not tolerate ignorant, rude or plain disrespectful language and attitudes. I encourage diverging opinions and insights, that’s where the sparks of change often come from, but if you’re going to engage with me, or others on my blog, I kindly ask you to be civilized, considerate and cool, dig? Thanks again for reading, I’m Grateful for your time and welcome invitations to read the blogs of others!

Take care and be well!


Take care and be well!
d'Philip Chalmers